Don't Give up


It seems this past weekend has a theme...Don't Give Up. It's funny how stubborn a person can be because this is not the first time God has spoken to me clearly, no not the Booming narrator voice but in print, or radio broadcast, conversation and more. You see it is no surprise I am a woman of many tasks. Often I question my need to appear capable, really if I would just be less able then I would be more happy. SURE because that is how it all breaks down. NOT!
Anyway, this weekend is the beginning of the marathon school year. Last Thursday my oldest daughter, Aunt and I headed to Columbia MO for her 2nd pageant. Assuming none of you are pageant moms let me tell you that it is a lot of hurry then wait kind of moments. It was by far not so stressful as it was long, well other than just before dear daughter would go on stage praying she did her best. Funny how you can feel like there is a bubble in time because I simply could not focus on anything else in my life including the mayhem that was looming ahead. We returned home, no crowns or titles or trophies later but certainly proud of a more than stellar performance. Silly me forgot all about the fact that babysitter family members would not at all ask the children to clean up. Sigh, because well I am a control/neatness freak. Anyway, I was much improved because I didn't get in a tizzy nor remark to the kids. Instead I enjoyed greeting and chatting in the midst of it all. Shortly after everyone headed to bed and what did I? Yep, I cleaned it all up :)
But back to my life lessons from God... I listen to Joy FM mostly and the moment from the message discussed in honor of the Olympics how life is a marathon and not a race. Sure, sure I like the concept but it lacks the glue which sticks to the heart of the meaning. THEN, this morning I jumped out of bed after determining that the buzzing alarm which went off for a full 3 minutes was in fact for me. Retrieving 2 children from their beds, getting them safely off to church for their new life class I took my shower. Among other things I ended up to church 10 minutes later than I wanted but with plenty of time to prepare the kind preschool teachers who enabled me to sit in service like a normal church-goer. I watched my husband, oldest daughter and son get baptized. I heard the amazingly precise prayers over each of them and committed my faith to those words as well. Again, in my no pressure bubble I sat with 19 other family members and worshiped God. Pastor began his message which hit home bringing me back to the notion that I can feel this at peace even during the stormy, rocky climb of beginning a school year. It was about a soul revolution, changing from the inside out. I cannot possibly quote enough here for it to speak to you effectively but let me use the scripture I wrote down: Matt 5:3 Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. You see that is really reminding us that we are nothing without God and that is exactly what he intended. Excuse me while I smack my own head in a DUH kind of action. His 3 points were 1. Give Up 2. Admit your helpless 3. Look UP

As I nodded my head with several amen's softly spoken I am sure this message was meant for many but no doubt it was truly for me. But that doesn't end my I reminder, nope I am terribly stubborn. As I sit here tonight working a PT shift not accomplishing any lesson planning like I should I read an article in the Children's ministry magazine which I LOVE. The article is titled Keep Going. Specifically and I quote, “You see...sometimes I get tired. I guess I'm not as spiritual as some, because every once in awhile I feel like quitting. But God always shows up and strengthens me.” He goes on but you get the idea. I am now sitting here shaking my head at it all thinking geez God even knows how ridiculious I am and that the only way to get the message across was through out of town adventures preventing my needless spinning, AND multiple mediums of reminders. When will I ever learn? This year maybe? Will this be the year I achieve my goal of balance?? It may just be.

I can account time after time when I have chosen to be relaxed in the midst of mess, the projects unfinished etc. This has been a catalyst year when it comes to cleanliness vs clutter of daily used items. It helps that my husband is home 20 days a month since March of this year too. All of it can seriously be thought of as a radical shift from our life the last 4 years for sure!
Regardless of all things I hear you God, I get the point. I am not sure how you are going to do all of it. But I absolutely know you WILL revel what I need to know at just the perfect time!!

***added reminders of God's steadfast plan is an unexpected back pay which covers the cost of car repairs for our family van (the only car that holds our whole family). God is oh so good!

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