Hmmmm


Is it possible to be lonely when you are not alone?


Can a person's mind run away with them?


Words are everything. They breathe life, they breathe death. People say don't sweat the small stuff, but isn't the small stuff what leads to the big stuff? I sit here alone in my room, well minus my cat and 4 sleeping children, and can't help but ponder my life, my choices. What ifs run amok. I normally avoid those thoughts, it really gets you nowhere in the here and now. The one thing the what ifs will do for me is help carve out my future. What if I let go of all that the past holds and cleave to the future? What if I change my focus, what can I become? Miracles are made by people who solely thought of the what if I can. Can I? Can I take baby steps to my future what-ifs? What are those what-ifs?


A friend once told me I put the people in my life in a certain category and leave them there. I suppose there is merit to that thought. Does that then mean I put myself in a box too??

Much to my chagrin, I have made a conscious effort to change the lines for one of my friends, and another in a positive rewarding way, but the others even if I open the top of the box it doesn't feel like they want to be anything other than what they are.


In life how many close friends does a person have? I have 2, and sadly my husband is not one of them. How do you become best friends with your spouse? I mean really, can many people say that statement and mean it. Best friends, wow. I don't think I know how to be his best friend, and he certainly has no clue how to be mine. Maybe that is the problem with society and marriage today. Course, maybe not. Is that something you are supposed to learn from premarital classes when you are about to be married? Or is that environmental learning from homes like Leave it to Beaver? When did we go from arranged marriage to choices, to fly-by-night marriage anyway? That is an entirely different can of worms. Sidestep that thought.


I am still waiting for my cowboy prince to ride in on his black horse, (I never really preferred white plus cowboys have a rustic I can take care of my woman style I love). He would sweep me off my feet with a passionate kiss and live happily ever after. Meanwhile, I will keep watching Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, The Little Mermaid, Beauty and Beast, and dream....



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