Savoring Moments
I am an active member of a local moms site. It has been my saving grace this last year in enduring the trials of being a SAHM. I have made a few friendships that my life would not be the same without. There really is no way to thank those people enough.
One of the newer moms to the site, but not new to parenting as she has 2 grown children and one grandchild pointed out her one regret is not savoring the moments. I think that will not be mine. Of course, there are times that I have wished to move past. I do believe I wished away #4's first year. Yet, in that wishing I did stop and smell the roses so to speak from time to time.
Now sitting here knowing I will never be pregnant again I have a few "moments" I can close my eyes and relive. Every pregnancy (except the first as it ended too early), near the very end, when the baby is big enough to sustain itself without me but remained a part of me I would take some time to revel in that. I remember with the last 3 being alone in the tub or bathroom looking in the mirror or down at my swollen belly. No words were spoken but I stopped everything just to feel the awe of the miracle taking place. So many woman dream of having a bit of what I have been blessed with 4 times. Yes, I savored that time. It is a moment no one can take away.
On occasion as I put #4 to bed I feel her breath in rhythm with mine, her heart beating against my chest and close my eyes. I take in the smell of her baby scent. The trust of her body fully rested close to mine. I can almost relive each of my other children in that same way. I have always rocked them, even if for only 5 minutes before bed. I rarely relinquished this duty other than absence, or illness.Some kids it was a special book, others a special song a few it was both.
Yes,those times have been mine to savor.
There are many more moments like this when I get quiet and take a mental picture to store for the days I don't like them as much. To flip to in my memory banks when in the car and the idea of driving on and not returning sounds appealing. There are moments shared between siblings when they are struggling and it would be easy to step in, yet I stand back and watch seeing the joy in their teamwork. Times when we all laugh, belly laugh together which cannot be replicated or even described. I want to press pause and take a picture use words to describe so it can never be forgotten. I want to have these words, the albums and scrapbooks to tell their story long after I am gone. That is my legacy, and it lives on within what we have shared and not just what we have done. I want to inspire awareness, love and joy. Yes, I do hope that savoring the moments won't be my regret.
I am sure I will regret something. We are all human and perfection is unattainable without God and even while on this earth. I am certain I will give them something to say they never want to do to their kids be it wipe walls, and baseboards as a chore:) There will be those things and that is OK. For now though I will do my very best with what God has entrusted me making their lives better than mine so they can do the same for themselves.
This all makes me think of the movie Elizabethtown where the main female character does just what I described. She stops and says click in a small whisper at just the right moment. Lucky for me a have a handy dandy rich girl phone as a few say to whip out and make it say click giving me that perfect picture, LOL.
One of the newer moms to the site, but not new to parenting as she has 2 grown children and one grandchild pointed out her one regret is not savoring the moments. I think that will not be mine. Of course, there are times that I have wished to move past. I do believe I wished away #4's first year. Yet, in that wishing I did stop and smell the roses so to speak from time to time.
Now sitting here knowing I will never be pregnant again I have a few "moments" I can close my eyes and relive. Every pregnancy (except the first as it ended too early), near the very end, when the baby is big enough to sustain itself without me but remained a part of me I would take some time to revel in that. I remember with the last 3 being alone in the tub or bathroom looking in the mirror or down at my swollen belly. No words were spoken but I stopped everything just to feel the awe of the miracle taking place. So many woman dream of having a bit of what I have been blessed with 4 times. Yes, I savored that time. It is a moment no one can take away.
On occasion as I put #4 to bed I feel her breath in rhythm with mine, her heart beating against my chest and close my eyes. I take in the smell of her baby scent. The trust of her body fully rested close to mine. I can almost relive each of my other children in that same way. I have always rocked them, even if for only 5 minutes before bed. I rarely relinquished this duty other than absence, or illness.Some kids it was a special book, others a special song a few it was both.
Yes,those times have been mine to savor.
There are many more moments like this when I get quiet and take a mental picture to store for the days I don't like them as much. To flip to in my memory banks when in the car and the idea of driving on and not returning sounds appealing. There are moments shared between siblings when they are struggling and it would be easy to step in, yet I stand back and watch seeing the joy in their teamwork. Times when we all laugh, belly laugh together which cannot be replicated or even described. I want to press pause and take a picture use words to describe so it can never be forgotten. I want to have these words, the albums and scrapbooks to tell their story long after I am gone. That is my legacy, and it lives on within what we have shared and not just what we have done. I want to inspire awareness, love and joy. Yes, I do hope that savoring the moments won't be my regret.
I am sure I will regret something. We are all human and perfection is unattainable without God and even while on this earth. I am certain I will give them something to say they never want to do to their kids be it wipe walls, and baseboards as a chore:) There will be those things and that is OK. For now though I will do my very best with what God has entrusted me making their lives better than mine so they can do the same for themselves.
This all makes me think of the movie Elizabethtown where the main female character does just what I described. She stops and says click in a small whisper at just the right moment. Lucky for me a have a handy dandy rich girl phone as a few say to whip out and make it say click giving me that perfect picture, LOL.
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